Kenny Loggins and who’s seein’ ya?
I have more than 9,000 songs on my iPod so far.
I have many more to still download.
As regular readers already know, I was a rock critic some years back during the glorious post-Nirvana boom days.
And as my longtime friends know, I am an inveterate snob (well, just like them actually).
OK, maybe I’m not that bad. Maybe I’m the only person I know who has Chaka Khan and Fugazi on the same iPod (at least I hope so. And, by the way, as I type this I put my iPod on shuffle and it started with Elliott Smith).
So I was a little surprised when my friend Mona invited me to see Kenny Loggins this week at the Orange County Performance Arts Center. I gather she was invited to tag along with someone and wanted to know if I’d like to join in. A clear sign I haven’t known her that long and that I’ve been on my best behavior. I mean, it’s a good sign I didn’t snarl or bark out in Lester-Bangs fashion some insulting tirade, right?
Actually it’s worse than that. I thought about it for a moment. Could I sit through a Kenny Loggins show? It might be fun, right?
What the hell? Am I getting soft in my old age?
It’s Kenny freakin’ Footloose Loggins!
I remember those goofy AOR hits he had. “This Is It,” “Your Momma Don’t Dance,” “Angry Eyes.” All syruppy, overproduced, slick post-folk-meets-vaguely-rockin’-bordering-on-muzac pop songs with insipid lyrics. Don’t get me started on the Winnie the Pooh stuff or the duets with Michael McDonald (who I do an expert impersonation of. Go ahead, call me on the phone and request it. I dare you. It’ll annoy the whole office as I warble away at “What a Fool Believes.”).
Loggins really hit it big with “Footloose,” a movie I actually tried sitting through for the first time finally while flipping channels at my sister’s house last summer. I lasted 5 minutes. Seeing Kevin Bacon flashdancing on beaters almost made me try to hurl the remote control through the TV. I might prefer “Keeping Up with the Kardashians” to that junk.
Oh alright, I’ll concede I’m just being cranky and over-the-top now, but the old Lester-Bangs-influenced critic comes out to play when I go off on these riffs. And, let’s face it, he was a million-times meaner than I ever was. But I can’t get the image of those preppie/yuppie college classmates at the school dances prancing around to “Footloose.” I’m sorry, it made me want to wretch. Couldn’t they play Husker Du? Oh, alright, maybe REM? The Cure? I’m begging here, Mr. DJ.
So, with apologies to OCPAC and Mona, I’ll pass. I’m sure a lot of people will enjoy the show. If I’m in the mood for that kind of music, I’ll scroll down to some James Taylor. Or maybe I’ll download some Jim Croce. But no way on the Gordon Lightfoot, OK?
Paul. It’s time to wipe out those thousands of tunes and put up a few hundred real good things — like Bach and Beethoven and Bartok.
A) you haven’t even seen the genius that is Footloose
B) it wasn’t an invitation, but more of a “I may be going, maybe you can score some press tickets and blog on it”
C) I hope you get a nasty letter from the Pacific Symphony, where the concert is being held…
Lester Bangs wasn’t mean, he was honest and blunt–it’s too bad he never made it long enough to give Loggins his medicine…
Yay for eclectic musical tastes. My oldest son asked me to load his Ipod up with music so here’s some of the playlist: REM, Mudhoney, John Coltrane, GAP Band, Miles Davis, Hendrix, Skynyrd, Jane’s Addiction, Rush, Vivaldi, Carl Orff, Soundgarden, Al Green, Jason and the Scorchers, Meat Puppets, Scratch Acid, Vic Chesnutt, Public Enemy, Dead Kennedys, Fugazi, Motorhead, Pylon, B-52s, Devo, Uncle Tupelo, Michael Schencker Group, Matthew Sweet, Beastie Boys, BB King, Stevie Ray Vaughn, and Sex Pistols. He loved it. And I hear you on the Loggins….couldn’t go there.